No, friend of a friend of a friend. I haven't gotten that million-dollar book deal yet. And no, I still don't have that super agent in New York. You're quite right, there are loads of books in the bookstores so you would think that it was rather easy to get a publishing deal. Yes, I suppose stringing some words together shouldn't be too hard at all and yes, a monkey really can do it.
Yes, my boyfriend's sister's boyfriend's cousin, I still am trying to be a writer. I'm not sure why I bother, as a matter of fact. Maybe I should take up a trade. Plumbing, eh? I've never considered it before but perhaps I should look in to it.
Thank you, my local Starbucks barrista. I would like a free pity cup of coffee. You've seen me crying over my laptop again? Oh, how embarrassing. I thought the table near the bathroom was just far enough away. Yes, I do take it with soy. Thank you.